I recently got hired at a pretty large-scale, fast-paced restaurant as a food runner and busser. This is my first job in the hospitality industry; I worked in corporate and in retail management previously. It's only been ten shifts, and I feel utterly lost and completely destroyed by this already. I understand it's a hard industry to navigate and very mentally draining; I need advice regarding whether this is just industry standards or specific to this location.

My training, more like a lack of training, was close to useless. It focused on dealing with customers and the POS system, which, in my position, I can't even use. My interactions with clients are close to none, and most of it consists of asking for water or ketchup, while I was training on order-taking. I was put in on my first day without knowing where cutlery, cups, or all the basics are. I was not told day to day tasks I need to complete but got reprimanded for just standing around on my first day during my first hour. However, the expectations are not lenient since I'm new. Something as simple as how to set up tables and forks has high expectations- how to hold them, where to place them, etc. but none of that was explained during my training. They have quite a quick turnover with staff, so I had concerns, but I did not realize it was this bad.

Management is very focused on helping staff but often doesnt communicate changes; cuts happen, and since I'm not a server, I often doesnt get informed but am still expected to adapt without knowing. Management also won't answer texts regarding availability and schedule outside, even if I informed them multiple times. I've already been reprimanded for not smiling, which would be understandable if it wasn't while I was putting dishes in the sink in the back, not exposed to customers. Staff is extremely cliquey. If I don't say may I before every sentence, they go to management and say I need to fix my demeanor and my face. I did not shadow anyone and was never informed regarding expectations and day-to-day tasks. Is this normal for the industry?

Context: I live in Florida and live 30 minutes out from the coast. I’ve been considering becoming a server (near the beach would be a plus). Theres no state income tax, and I feel like I’d be good at it.
I’ve been working in the food industry for over a decade, but no experience as a server. Most places I’ve looked into are either filled up or nothing comes out of sending in my resume. I’ve considered taking a day trip to a list of restaurants, and talking to them directly. I’d like to avoid being a hostess to start out. Any advice?

I work at a sports bar, & have been here for just over 3 years now. Since the beginning, ive had this family of regulars come in multiple times, & every single time i have them, they work me ragged, & then NEVER tip. They have even flaunted the idea of tipping me TO ME, & STILL left nothing. & it makes no sense, because every time I have them, they eat me up, & tell me how great of a server I am & how attentive I am. Yet they NEVER tip me. So at this point, whenever they come in & sit in my section, I let my manager know they are there, & that I am refusing service. I never have said it TO THE CUSTOMERS, just my manager. The manager is understanding, & another server does typically pick it up, but then THEY are also stiffed in the end.

I guess my real question is, is it wrong to refuse service to a customer if I know 100% they will over work me with no tip? Can I TELL them that?? & if so, wtf do i say??

Hello r/Waiters! I am a 23F. I have been working in restaurants since 16. I started at a wing place hosting/foodrunning/working togo. I eventually became I server. I loved this location. Everyone was close to my age. We made great money (especially for high school/college). The owners sold the restaurant without telling us after I had been there for 5 years. Before this, I really loved serving. I loved the camaraderie and talking to guests and meeting people. I feel like this experience tainted my view of restaurant work in general.

At this point, I was a Junior in college studying Computer Science. I did well in school, but I truly couldn't have picked a worse time to enter the CS field. Almost none of my former classmates have CS jobs. I interned at a regional bank for a while, but I disliked it so much. I hated the monotony, the corporate environment, being in a cubicle by myself all day. I couldn't wait to finish the internship and get back to serving, which I had basically loved up until this point.

After graduating, I wasn't sure what to do so I just kept serving tables. It has been around a year and a half since graduating. I work at a corporate chain. I have never disliked a job like this one. Catty coworkers, crazy clientele, etc. I don't know that I have anything positive to say about it. I am so burnt out of the job I used to love. I already have a degree, but I am finishing my prerequisites for a healthcare program of some kind. I am so fearful that I won't be good at any other job. Do I just hate working now? I still enjoy people, but I am so tired of being looked down on by the people I serve. The job feels so hard now. My parents don't have serving or retail experience, they don't think it is difficult. I feel like if I can't hack it in a job like serving, will I hate other industries just as much? What kind of jobs do I even look for? I have switched my availability to only weekends to make room for my classes during the week. I start dreading my shifts the minute they post them on Monday. I genuinely have no idea how career servers do it. I feel like restaurant work is a vampire feeding on my life force. Dramatic but maybe true.

I guess I am looking for people who have A) successfully left the industry and how they did it B) servers who commiserate with me or C) any other type of advice. I feel so lonely and bad. I feel like no one gets how hard it is to leave. I am a great server. I don't know how to cope with starting over and maybe being bad at a new job. When I started in restaurants, I was warned about "getting stuck" from the fast money. I would have never thought it happened to me, but it 1000% did! How do I break this cycle? What did you leave for (if you're out), did you like it, and did your serving experience keep serving you after it ended? Thank you in advance!

Hi all. I’m about to graduate nursing school at 19 and enter adulthood.

I currently work as a server at the Four Seasons, doing 3 8.5-hour shifts a week. I average $45-75 an hour, with full benefits, free food, and free travel within the four seasons. I also have two part-time serving gigs, making an additional $500 a week. Combined, I average around $6500 a month.

Nurses start at $45 an hour where I live, and the roles I apply to are about 24-30 hours a week, earning me $4320-5400 a month. I’m interested in grad school, which would increase my income potential. I have no location-bound commitments besides these serving gigs. Travel and work-life balance are important to me, so I’ll factor that into my decision.

I enjoy both careers, but it’s a difficult transition. I’d make more money as a server, but nursing has higher responsibilities, longer term growth potential, and a higher income ceiling.

My good serving job requires at least 24 hours a week, including weekends, and nursing also requires weekends. It’s a choice between the two. Despite the high income potential, combining them would sacrifice my peace.

How should I navigate this? Should I stick to serving for a bit, ride out this cushy income, try to incorporate my side gigs and nursing, or put all my eggs into nursing? Any advice is appreciated. I’m young and fairly free right now.

Hey everyone. I work at a chain restaurant and just got hired on last week. 3 days of training and tonight, my first shift on my own..and I did terrible.

I’m 25, never served before or done anything remotely close.

The night started off okay, but I got flustered during the dinner rush. I did a duplicate order (which I caught before it came out luckily, but I had to have a manger fix it because I’m still not super familiar with the POS) and on a separate table I order the wrong entree for a guest. My manager had to help me out three times, something I’m sure he was irritated with.

Not to mention me forgetting refills/taking too long and all my other mess ups I’m forgetting. I felt like a chicken running around with its head cut off, seriously. Not to mention feeling so out of place and like I was in everyone’s way. I definitely saw others role their eyes or become flippant when I asked questions.

I don’t know, I just had to vent supposed and think maybe serving isn’t for me. I don’t consider myself idiotic or lackadaisical by any means, but I felt that way all night and am nervous for my next shift.

Asked this in AskReddit but I thought this place would be more fitting. Does it screw you up when we try to help?

Hey, I was wondering if I could get further options from any servers who may have experienced this. I posted my story on r/legaladvice and determined I was in the clear legally. I just want to know if anyone else has dealt with a similar issue and how it was resolved for you. Thanks!

When you see that carry out order and notice they didn’t leave a tip, does it make you think differently?

If you do expect tips for carry out orders, what service exactly are we tipping for?

I’m curious what the differences are between a catering/event type position and a hostess job at a restaurant. I am looking to supplement my full-time job with a part-time job or two. I have the opportunity to work for a catering/events company on a per diem basis so I essentially would get to pick the shifts that I’m available for. I can work as little or as much as I want depending on the events that are available. I also was offered a hostess position at a local restaurant. They asked if I could work every Saturday with the possibility of switching shifts or getting a weekend off by working it out with the other hosts, but essentially I would be scheduled for every Saturday shift from noon till around eight or nine. I would be able to accept both positions because the event staff job is on a per diem basis, but based on looking at what events they’ve done in the past it seems like the days that would pretty much work with my schedule are weekends, especially Saturdays. So if I take the hostess job that would eliminate a large chunk of potential shifts at the catering place. We are getting into winter now so I’m assuming there won’t be as many events coming up and the host job should be pretty consistent.

I guess after all that rambling, my question would be do you think it’s worth taking the hostess job as well as the events job knowing that I’m going to have pretty limited availability when it comes to the events position or should I look into finding a different job that I won’t be scheduled every single Saturday so it’ll work better with the per diem events staffing position?

Are there any hooters girl here? I’m lowkey thinking about applying but I want to ask someone who has worked at hooters a few questions first.

the restaurant i work at sometimes cuts the volume server early when its not busy and that results in the volume server having to introduce their tables to the new server taking care of them.

any advice on how to relay this to customers?

i once said "hey yall i want to introduce you to [name] who will be taking care of you for the rest of the evening while i step back and close some things off at the back of the restaurant. y'all have been so wonderful and i hope to see you again soon for longer" or something along the lines

note: we get tip pool so we're not really worried about taking each other's or anything

hi guys im trying to decided which restauraunt i should work at, ive been hired by both

1. Ramen restauraunt (kuyramen) with 1.2k reviews (4.1☆)

they pay 5/hr base but they also tip pool, its also a fairly old restauraunt

$20-$50 is the price range

1. New japanese teppanyaki restauraunt (pepper lunch) 767 reviews (4.8☆)

they dont do tip pool but they are pretty new only opened up this summer

price range is about $10-$20

i havent served before but theyre both serving jobs, which one do you guys think i can get the most money

Hi everyone! I’m curious about the experiences of other women working in hospitality. Have you ever experienced situations where male customers — especially married men — crossed the line between being friendly and flirting or showing romantic interest? How did you deal with it while still remaining professional?
I recently spoke to another woman who owns a café, and I was surprised by how similar some of our experiences were. It made me wonder how common this actually is for women working in hospitality. I’d love to hear your experiences.

So Im a bartender. One of my kiddos had a field trip to a casual restaurant. His class is supposed to learn how to order, do math, and tip. The kids bring their own money. I feel sorry for the server splitting these checks but I digress. Kiddo comes home and I asked if he tipped his server. He said yes, but it was only $2. Knowing the price of this restaurant thats not 20%. 20% probably should have been $3. Apparently the teachers arent teaching them to tip 20%. Or arent paying attention. I'm not sure. I think anything less than 20% on a field trip like this is unacceptable. I'm thinking next time on his permission slip that kiddo has to tip 20% and teach him when we go out to eat ourselves but other than that I don't know what do. I'm kind of mad on the server's behalf.

I’m looking to move out of my hometown and into NYC for more opportunities and a more active environment. I have about 5 years of restaurant/serving experience along with a bachelor’s degree. I’ve worked as a hostess in a steakhouse and as a server at an upscale waterfront restaurant, in addition to several years serving at BYOB mom-and-pop restaurants.

For those currently serving in NYC, what helped you get your foot in the door, and how much are you making on average? Any particular types of restaurants I should target with my experience?

Thanks!

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Hi! I am moving to nyc (hopefully) soon with my longterm partner and I am looking for jobs. His brother works at a Kura Sushi in the nyc area and of course I am also going to ask his opinion, but I figured I'd ask extra advice.

I'm not looking to stay at this job for long, I will be actively applying to other jobs while I work there, its kind of going to be a means to an end job.

In the nyc area the base pay for servers is around $11.50/hr. And ive seen that the tipś are split up by the servers and the back people, not dishwashers though. I know his brother has made quite a bit, sometimes he will make over $200 in tipŝ in one night since he works in a very busy location, and honestly thats the kind of job I will need.

I've been in Customer service for 5 years so I think I can handle that aspect, im more so asking about the culture of Kura and if you make a liveable wage. (Liveable in general, I know nyc area is more expensive but I will be living with my partner so we will have two incomes) with the tipś being split I feel as though I wouldn't actually be making enough to survive. Im thinking 35-40hrs a week.

Any advice is appreciated as I have never been a server before! Thank you

I want to preface this by saying that I am not coming at this topic from any sort of negative standpoint. I think it’s a great option for anyone on a budget.

That being said, within the past 6 months I’ve noticed a HUGE uptick in tables wanting to split one entree between two or even three people. I am an extremely accommodative waitress, but even I struggle to keep up with the inevitable requests that follow when 3 people are trying to make an entire meal out of splitting 1 ribeye.

As soon as I bring the food out, I can tell that most of the time we are going to have a problem. They’ll typically need more sauces, plates, extra fries on the fly (because the side of fries isn’t meant to feed 3 people?) which results in a LOT of trips to the kitchen.

Again, I generally love taking care of my tables because at the end of the day it’s their dining experience and I want it to be a nice evening for them. Recently, though, it’s just become too much. When the meal comes out and my guests see that it is, like I said, only one portion of food, they’ll start ordering sides on the fly and expect them out ASAP. It’s starting to really bother our kitchen staff, too.

I’m wondering if other servers are also noticing this trend + how you guys are handling the extra requests that come with plate splitting?

I work in a restaurant where the chefs are the worst..they are so prideful and look down on us..the best part is every cent of our tip is split 50/50..I mean the kitchen closes 2hours before us but they still get 50/50..on top of they when the shift ends the eat their full and make sure to dispose any food left so we get nothing to eat...I mean we work hard...the customers want us to get the tip we always go above and beyond...and the number of run away guest bill we have to pay won't even cover it.. during busy time if we make a mistake with the food they say punch another one and pay for the old one..and if they make a mistake they don't pay a penny...we are splitting tips 50/50 and taking all the disadvantages...I'm so tired...but sadly times are hard here and I need this job

Seconds after you leave the table.. OR (what really sparked this post !!) one of your other tables telling you how mean the people next to them were after you walked away. (These people are your regulars & couldn’t believe it.)
I don’t know how to label/coin this type of thing but has anyone else experienced similar?! My other table was so annoyed at them but didn’t want to say anything and told me they just didn’t want conflict. it’s all cus of the kitchen man….!

The kitchen kept fucking up today. They forgot crab legs in 2 seafood boil bags and that’s usually the main thing!!

SO it took 15 minutes for this man to get his oysters and he ended up getting them to-go and I even gave him a 20% discount.. I thought it was a shitty situation but I’m not in control of that!!
Anyway today was the first time another table was like “I’m so sorry about them like ew I hated them” and I’m like “oh noooo….. what’d they say 😅 I’m nosey 😜” like jeeeeeez they were so nice to my face too. Like actually grow a pair ugh. I’m only one human BEING