Pete Hegseth: I’ll purge army of fatties, beardos and weirdos

[u/TimesandSundayTimes]

https://www.thetimes.com/us/american-politics/article/pete-hegseth-speech-us-military-fatties-beardos-fxcnk8blq

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[u/Orange_Kid]

Poor J.D. is 0-3

[u/CitronTraining2114 → u/Orange_Kid]

Yeah, but his idea of "service" involves a couch.

[u/feartheswans → u/CitronTraining2114]

Hey, being an armchair warrior is exhausting

[u/onepareil → u/Orange_Kid]

Not anymore now that Bobby Brainworms is hand-feeding him sauerkraut.

[u/drtolmn69]

Can you purge the White House of that fatty weirdo?

[u/Colonel-Mooseknuckle → u/drtolmn69]

There's a reason the word "weird" stuck so much during the last election.

[u/Present_Confection83 → u/Colonel-Mooseknuckle]

Yup and abandoning it halfway through the (admittedly truncated) campaign was a mistake

[u/Faux-Foe → u/Present_Confection83]

At the recommendation of the same consultants that helped Hillary lose her election.

[u/Zulmoka531 → u/Faux-Foe]

The “they go low, we go high” mantra was so incredibly stupid. There’s a reason why Trump had it out for Walz, and its because he got under his skin

[u/j0llyllama → u/Zulmoka531]

And because his racist worldview doesnt allow him to see minorities or women as competition for him, but Walz was a white man- the only demo that can rival him in his mind.

[u/ironballs16 → u/Zulmoka531]

Plus the "Weird" was focused on GOP politicians, officials, and policies, which handily avoided the "deplorables" misstep of the Clinton campaign or the 47% one from Romney.

[u/POEness → u/Faux-Foe]

Those same consultants also said not to ask for a recount. If she had she would be president now.

[u/dychronalicousness → u/Faux-Foe]

They should probably be identified, banned from the Democratic Party, and then banished to some remote Alaskan island surrounded by mutant seabass with frickin laser beams attached to their heads.

[u/aradraugfea → u/Colonel-Mooseknuckle]

Their whole philosophy depends on them being the normal ones. That they’re the default against which everyone else is compare. Part of a silent majority, a subset not afraid to “say what everyone is thinking.”

By calling them out as the minority position, it all falls apart, and they are weird, deeply, deeply weird.

[u/supercyberlurker]

I don't understand the 'beardo' hate.. wasn't that the whole special forces look?

When did having beards become 'woke'?

[u/Reaper-fromabove → u/supercyberlurker]

Because the majority of people who get shaving waivers are black men.
They’re hoping to get rid of them under the guise of no beards.
I’d like to see the if dudes that claim some type of religious exemption will also be targeted. Highly doubt it.

[u/immortalalchemist → u/Reaper-fromabove]

To add to this: Black men wanted shaving waivers because we have different hair textures, one of which is tight curls and with facial hair, those tight curls can curve back into the skin causing the phenomenon known as razor bumps which is extremely annoying.

[u/MaidPoorly → u/immortalalchemist]

I’m a white guy with bad ingrowns. Daily shaving would build up cuts and bumps that then get cut until my face looked like raw beef. It’s like 10% of Caucasian and 30% of African men deal with it so it’s not even a majority. Just needlessly cruel and petty.

[u/Quovadisdomi → u/MaidPoorly]

I think the cruelty is the point for them unfortunately.

[u/benmrii → u/immortalalchemist]

Thank you for sharing this. Not enough people are aware of the legitimate concerns that other people have. Of differences that create other circumstances among the myriad people who choose to serve, or even more broadly are a part of humanity.

This seems to me as the foundation of so much racism and bigotry, institutional and otherwise: the unwillingness to allow or even acknowledge that some people have different experiences and needs, and that those experiences and needs are no less valid.

[u/HerbaciousTea → u/immortalalchemist]

And not just annoying. For a lot of people, it causes infections, which then scar up and make the issue compoundingly worse. It's a medical issue, not a cosmetic one. That's why the waivers exist.

It affects black a lot men more than other groups, so yeah, racist shitheads like Hegseth have grabbed onto it.

[u/OPengiun → u/immortalalchemist]

Going off of what you said, for those of you who don't know, this is a real medical thing, and is called pseudofolliculitis barbae. It puts you at a tremendously higher risk of folliculitis (infection of the follicles). It is extremely painful and can be disfiguring.

Many men get this, but it happens way more for black/african descent (40-80%), due to differences in hair and skin.

This is medical, not aesthetics or preference or cosmetic.

[u/FlatulistMaster → u/Reaper-fromabove]

Since when have racists wanted to restrict people of color from being cannon fodder?

[u/indigo121 → u/FlatulistMaster]

If Pete were a military strategist he might consider that angle. But he's not. He's a propaganda actor that got put in charge of stuff because our president is a moron who can't tell TV from reality. He's obsessed with making sure the army is a bunch of young muscular white men that radiate a sense of racial superiority. See the way way he keeps talking about the fucking warrior ethos as if he missed the memo that every successful general ever has realized that wars are fought on battlefields but won on supply lines.

[u/JMurdock77 → u/indigo121]

You think he thinks wars are fought and won with spears and shield walls, that muscle mass matters?

[u/professorlust → u/JMurdock77]

He’s love with the propaganda of war, not war itself.

You know the kind of guy who thinks Marion Morrison really served in combat.

But it fact it was only in his Drag King persona, John Wayne, that Marion played the part of a grizzled tough guy

[u/iWolfeeelol → u/JMurdock77]

Wasn't he promoting TRT for the military? I think that means yes he does think muscle mass matters.

[u/MammothPost4047 → u/JMurdock77]

Ukraine has entered the chat.

Pete is a fucking dumb ass.

[u/DeterminedThrowaway → u/JMurdock77]

Have you not been paying attention at all? They've been fetishizing big burly men the whole time. The spear and shield part is irrelevant, they just have a particular idea of what a "tough guy" looks like and do believe the military is better off and more effective if it's full of "tough guys". It doesn't matter that they need a huge collection of various skills, if your mechanic doesn't look like Rambo then it's not "warrior ethos" and "makes the U.S. look bad"

[u/WestleyMc → u/FlatulistMaster]

Since there was a non-zero chance the military are going to be asked to keep a white man in charge after his second term comes to an end, by force.

[u/pimparo0 → u/FlatulistMaster]

That gives them combat training, which makes them nervous. Look at ww1 and WW2 with US segregated troops. 

[u/derpicorn69 → u/FlatulistMaster]

because they are planning a race war, I'm not even joking. In addition to the true believers of white supremacy (such as the 3 civilians cited in this article, plus this administration), stoking racial violence in the US has been at the heart of Russian strategy as shown in Foundations of Geopolitics authored by Aleksandr Dugin

[u/turdlepikle → u/FlatulistMaster]

This is the part that confuses me. Wouldn't they want to sacrifice "other" people?

[u/SadFeed63 → u/Reaper-fromabove]

Yep. Same old Southern Strategy style approach they've been using forever.

[u/OldKingClancey → u/supercyberlurker]

There’s two lines of thinking

1: It’s a masculinity thing and since Pisshead Pete can’t grow a beard he’s taking it out on those who can

2: It’s a racial thing since non-white facial hair is difficult and uncomfortable to keep at a maintained shaved length

[u/TaterForming → u/OldKingClancey]

I think that one is actually number 2.

Or maybe ol' Petey was cucked by a dude in a beard while he was out on a Sieg Heil Bender after throwing the axe at the pedestrian.

[u/spacemusclehampster → u/TaterForming]

No, it’s def both. Man’s got a straight up white supremacist tattoo on his chest and can’t grow a beard

[u/Blind-_-Tiger → u/TaterForming]

Um actually... it's number 3:

Pete prefers a hard man with a kissably smooth face and a "whole lot of firepower," he talks about it constantly, how he wants to not be awake with them/they should sleep together to fight big woke, he mentions it every chance he gets, especially when he's hammered (which is all the time, he's always thinking about when he can get really really hammered by...uh with the guys again) and decides to make a thinly-veiled speech about it on stage in front of his captive audience of all of our military men.

He's also always getting his sweat on with RFK and the men and hating on trans people cuz he doesn't like surprises! Also anyone else notice the pentagon's shape is a very large butthole! It all makes sense and I explain it all in my book "How Does Everyone Not See This: America's Yuckiest Men."

[u/TaterForming → u/Blind-_-Tiger]

Ok...off to clean my brain with mouthwash...

[u/Monkeyfeng → u/OldKingClancey]

Or he has a twink fetish.

[u/Oleg101 → u/supercyberlurker]

Yeah just think of all the people we saw storm the Capitol that had beards too.

[u/KaptainKardboard → u/Oleg101]

Or the 90% of angry MAGA voters whose social media profiles are all bearded dudes with sunglasses taking a selfie in their car

[u/gzr4dr → u/KaptainKardboard]

Truck. As big of a truck as possible.

[u/ConflictTop1543 → u/gzr4dr]

With an engine that has a weirdly suggestive brand name like Cummins, Powerstroke, or Duramax.

[u/gzr4dr → u/ConflictTop1543]

That's hilarious. I never thought about it that way and it likely played a role by the marketing departments that came up with the names.

[u/deadieraccoon → u/supercyberlurker]

It's because PoC were given different grooming standards due to different needs when it came to hair. Black people for example, can get bad skin conditions from shaving (not at all ubiquitous just saying why the rules existed).

This is 100% just Hegseth using a dogwhistle. He wants to removed PoC from the military because hes a white supremacist.

[u/OneBrownRecluse → u/supercyberlurker]

"Although the updated standards affect all service members with beards, they draw ire from those who claim the rules disproportionately affect men of African descent. Up to 60% of Black men have PFB, according to the American Osteopathic College of Dermatology. According to the US Department of Defense (DoD) 2023 Demographics: Profile of the Military Community, service members who self-identify as Black or African American make up 17% of the total DoD military force (N = 2,034,426). Of 1,273,382 active-duty members, 18% are Black. Of 1,038,909 active-duty enlisted members, 20% are Black, and 9% of 234,473 active-duty officers are Black.

“Almost 65% of the US Air Force shaving waivers are held by Black men. And PFB is one of the most common reasons,” DanTasia Welch, MS, told Federal Practitioner. She, along with Richard P. Usatine, MD, and Candrice R. Heath, MD, wrote a recent review of the impact of PFB that was published in Federal Practitioner. "

It's racism, basically

[u/Faux-Foe → u/supercyberlurker]

Non-whites have a higher tendency to have medical issues with frequent shaving causing skin conditions.

[u/supercyberlurker → u/Faux-Foe]

Oh.. yeah that fits maga motivations and makes sense.

[u/HyperactivePandah → u/supercyberlurker]

Right?

Just try to figure out what the most racist reason behind whatever action they take is, and you're probably spot on.

[u/aculady → u/supercyberlurker]

Because black soldiers are far more likely to have a medical profile that allows them to grow a beard (due to being prone to folliculitis), and ranting about getting rid of soldiers with beards doesn't get him into the legal trouble that ranting about getting "the blacks" out of the military would.

[u/JasonVorhehees → u/supercyberlurker]

Because it’s veiled racism

[u/hfvsucgc → u/supercyberlurker]

African Americans can get ingrown hairs from regular shaving apparently, and are giving exemptions. So.

[u/Lucius-Halthier → u/supercyberlurker]

When he says beardos it’s an attack on black servicemen who usually get a shaving waiver because of things like pseudofolliculitis barbae and ingrown hairs. this disproportionately affects black servicemen who account for most of the waivers, it’s just the regime being racist shits who want an army of ubermensch while pushing everyone else out

[u/kyxtant → u/supercyberlurker]

Aside from the medical exemptions, religious exemptions can be made. Those exemptions are often given to devout Sihks, Jews, Muslims, and Norse Pagans.

So in addition to be discriminatory against black men, Petey gets the added bonus of discriminating against non-Christian men.

[u/woffdaddy → u/kyxtant]

It's that. bringing beards into the list is a subtle nod towards POC (which includes Arabs and jews) without outright saying "not white". Weirdos is a nod towards democrats and the lgbtq community.

the next time someone says "both sides" i might slap them. do both sides enrich themselves at the expense of the people? yes. do both sides fight to create a white Christian ethno-state though discrimination, selective law enforcement, and regulatory capture? fuck no, republicans have that shit locked down. Even your most middle of the road corporate dem is nothing worse than ambivalent to progress, while the most pinko-commie republican still fights like hell to take someones rights away.

[u/DrunkAndHornyGuy]

So he said a lot of crazy stupid stuff yesterday (and people really don't get that the 'beardos' stuff is a racist dogwhisle about black service members) but the Religious Affairs Office he announced might be the most dangerous. The 'constitutionality' of it aside, Hegseth's religion has gotten shockingly little coverage for how extreme it is.

Hegseth's pastor that he promotes all around Washington now is Doug Wilson, a Neo-confederate white supremacist. He’s written fondly about the confederacy and slavery. He’s called for his followers to have ‘more white babies’, believes women are pretty much breeding property and shouldn't be allowed to vote. And just a few years ago he said that while he wasn’t a full on ‘forced removal from the country’ type segregationist, he still ‘found no kinship’ with anyone who thought the races are equal. He's called for the criminalization of homsexualty. He believes in 'household voting' where the 'man of the house' votes for both him and his wife. Wilson does not think non-christians should be allowed in government or to be allowed to vote. He does not believe that women or homosexuals should be allowed in the workforce at all or that non-whites should be able to hold the same jobs as whites.

This is the religion of the man leading our military and who want to set up an office to spread that religion through it's ranks. It's really striking and frankly telling how much scrutiny the corporate media gave to Jeremiah Wright, Obama's pastor, for saying damn America for how we treated back people, as opposed to how little media seems to care that the secretary of defense's pastor Doug Willson is an open white supremacist and they are trying to officially spread that through the military. (Almost like our corporate media is fundamentally white supramcist and bigoted too or something)

[u/goscha- → u/DrunkAndHornyGuy]

Thank you for reminding me to pick up my slack again on updating my information about these crazy christian nationalists because I’ve decided to check out for half a month on this topic. I’m so tired but readings gotta be done again. Fck these crazy mfs.

[u/Keikobad]

Next on the list: preservation of precious bodily fluids

[u/acemerrill → u/Keikobad]

Those filthy commies, ruining our purity of essence.

[u/ALoudMeow → u/acemerrill]

Gentlemen, you can’t fight in here, this is the War Room!

[u/I_only_post_here → u/Keikobad]

We need to look into those essence measurement minimums

[u/Trump_Russia → u/Keikobad]

Bro I think of this shit all the time during this administration.

It's like we're being trolled, like they have no idea that there's satire out there that's honestly on par with the weird shit these people come up with.

[u/MortadellaBarbie → u/Keikobad]

From now on the troops can only drink rainwater and grain alcohol.

[u/deanreevesii → u/Keikobad]

https://youtu.be/TrrlQc4xvmE?is=y8etLATKc1tb8suI

[u/Chocolate_Bourbon → u/Keikobad]

“But if we bring him in here, he’ll see the big board.” (Knowing look)
“He’ll see everything.”

[u/mk72206]

Of course they removed the disgusting slur from the quote.

[u/SleekCapybara → u/mk72206]

As a trans person it's unsurprising. Media loves to white wash transphobia any attempt it gets

[u/PhroneticReflex → u/SleekCapybara]

Sadly, as a cis person, it's unsurprising, as well. 

I try to loudly support trans people whenever I can so that pieces of shit like Hegseth go on the defensive. 

[u/WildWonders457 → u/mk72206]

if i had to take a wild guess since i havent seen it, its the t word right

[u/mk72206 → u/WildWonders457]

Sure is

[u/MintyFresh42069XxX → u/mk72206]

Is it banned on here? I don't like the word, but I really dont like that this post left out the fact he said it

[u/Chillythefridgeman → u/mk72206]

yeah it's really gutless

[u/mcfarmer72]

Just because he can’t grow a beard.

[u/TheJarisaDoor3 → u/mcfarmer72]

You know I'm starting to think this is all some kind of personal grudge thing about something that happened while he was in the military that he's trying to relive. I do think the getting rid of the generals is just because they're fighting back, but all this other crap? Im thinking it's some kind of personal vendetta.

[u/Ok-Entertainer-1414 → u/mcfarmer72]

No, it's because he's racist and wants black people out of the military (who commonly have a condition that makes staying clean-shaven painful)

[u/xyphon0010]

So... He'll purge himself as well, right?

[u/Lone-Frequency → u/xyphon0010]

Guy is obsessed with other men's bodies, particularly what is going on inside their balls.

[u/Rocket_69]

Beardos? Has he met an SF team?

[u/ThePedanticWalrus]

What a weird little goblin

[u/BluWake]

What if the fatties, beardos and weirdos are critical support staff? Or intelligence officers? Medics? Drone pilots? Or does everyone need to be a stack of muscles with three balls?

[u/afriendincanada → u/BluWake]

The military doesn't need those things. It needs WARRIORS.

[u/Loyal-Opposition-USA → u/afriendincanada]

Even the best front line dudes get killed regularly without regard to their muscle mass, skill, testosterone levels, training. Sometimes you just walk into a bullet getting off a helicopter. Winning wars depends heavily on logistics and planning.

I think Hegseth has watched “Heartbreak Ridge” one time too many.

[u/TrickyWinger]

Why is Thad Castle in charge of our military?

[u/sweetperdition → u/TrickyWinger]

I WISH this dude had that level of leadership

[u/qoes → u/sweetperdition]

Hegseth doesn't have the mental fortitude it takes to do an oil change 

[u/zappy487 → u/qoes]

TARTAR SAUCE IS FOR FISH STICKS

[u/MortadellaBarbie]

Says a guy whose first action as Secretary of Defense was to install a makeup room at the Pentagon.

[u/Froggyevening]

Fatties, beardos and weirdos are literally what MAGA is.

[u/MarvelousVanGlorious]

“Now here are Jake and Logan Paul. Two bearded weirdos to give you guys some inspiration.”

[u/abigdonut]

also "tr*nnies" because he loves dropping that slur whenever he gets the chance and for some reason it's not considered newsworthy

[u/Godwinson4King → u/abigdonut]

Yeah, the Secretary of defense using a slur to describe military planning is fucked up and worth calling out too.

[u/MountainMan2_ → u/abigdonut]

Also, quick reminder that his job is supposed to be winning the war in Iran. (At least according to this administration). So he's just ignoring that completely. Like, imagine if instead of mobilizing in North Africa, Rommel spent half the desert campaign sorting his men by height and executing people who were exactly 152cm tall. Imagine how much easier it would have been to win that fight, imagine how pissed hitler would have been as his precious tank armies sat in a ditch with measuring tapes for hours each day.

That's what we are doing here. I used to think Fox news personalities were grifters that didn't actually care about the culture wars they peddled- because after all, there's literally no reason to give a shit if someone is trans or has a beard in like 99% of cases. But no. This eats hegseth up, somehow. He actually does care, enough to lose a war, commit war crimes, ruin lives over it. It's tied to his ego, like that man that lived with a rail spike in his head.

[u/Fatali → u/abigdonut]

Yup, fuck that guy

People like him are why I don't feel safe at work.

[u/johnsciarrino → u/abigdonut]

Pedos conspicuously absent from his list.

[u/LoresVro]

While serving the fatass President.

[u/marshj_00]

Apparently the batshit crazy are still ok

[u/Gibder16]

Beardos? Is he jealous because he’s unable to grow a beard himself?

Like what the hell does that even mean anyway?

[u/ich_bin_alkoholiker → u/Gibder16]

Definitely a weird ego thing.

[u/hickory]

Hegseth is so deep in the closet he is gonna find narnia

[u/fffan9391]

Headline left out the slur for trans people.

[u/Kerbonaut2019 → u/fffan9391]

I’ve been seeing this with pretty much every outlet reporting it too. CNN’s headline today included only “beardos, weirdos, and wimps.” Not that CNN is the greatest, but millions of Americans (and voters) watch that network and they’re getting a watered down version of what Hegseth actually said.

[u/NeverPostThings → u/fffan9391]

We’re the only minority group where the government feels like it has clearance to openly slur us and nobody seems to care. It just gets written out of the story. They don’t want us here. Unfortunately for them we aren’t going away

[u/Sanity_N0t_Included]

If they performed the same 'purge' on ICE it would decimate their numbers....

[u/Ok-Pin7265]

He is a weirdo

[u/Gamerxx13]

are beards woke? i thought beards look manly?

[u/OHdulcenea → u/Gamerxx13]

Black men tend to have skin problems related to shaving and so were more likely to have shaving exceptions. It’s just racism.

[u/NoOnesKing]

So does that include the Commander in Chief who is also a fatty and a weirdo

[u/HighFivePondaBaba]

Every three months this guy goes on TV and says “bring me burly and jacked oiled men with lots of testosterone and beautiful balls and NO WOMEN AT ALL just the big hot hunky guys” and then he does two pull-ups and loses three wars and we’re all supposed to pretend any of this is normal behavior.

[u/iKangaeru]

...Said the weridest weirdo at the Pentagon.

[u/universaltoilet]

The special operations groups have the beardos, no? No patch Pete strikes again

[u/MaximumNameDensity]

I was in for 9 years... And I just don't understand the obsession with being clean shaven.

[u/LaughingJackStudio → u/MaximumNameDensity]

Black people are more prone to medically significant razer irritation and therefore are more likely to have a shaving waiver.

Putting the pieces together yet?

[u/themattboard]

Um, he knows who is boss and vice-boss are, right?

[u/raerae1991]

Hegseth is a weirdo and has a history of SA, can we purge him?

[u/coffinspacexdragon → u/raerae1991]

The House can't be in session because he was about to be purged.

[u/Mr_XcX]

I just don't understand why the need to be so cruel about people.

[u/onepareil]

It’s an entire administration of shithead high school bullies. His brain is so pickled it’s reverting to its 16-year-old state, only with fewer brain cells now.

[u/Just_One_Victory]

How about pedos, alkies and nazis? No?

[u/Substantial_Dog8413]

what a sad excuse of a man he is… an indiot anchorman directed by idiots; this wont end well :/

[u/PierceBel]

Says the guy with shitloads of makeup, a stylist and has expensive manicures and hair.

[u/KaptainKardboard]

History will be very unkind to Hegseth.

[u/ASealNamedHoover]

“Fatty, Beardo, Weirdo”

I know just the VP

[u/Degoro]

I will never forgive those who voted to confirm him.

[u/Few_Personality_990]

The United Clowns of America, everyone 🤡🤡🤡

[u/Old_Channel44]

Seal Team 6 had beards

[u/fuckdirectv]

Translation: Pete can't grow a beard.

[u/Think_Shift3126]

“Beardos” might be the funniest word I’ve heard all week 

[u/Dajmibuzi_dzieki → u/Think_Shift3126]

What does it mean? 😂

[u/Rocket_69 → u/Dajmibuzi_dzieki]

People with beards - so most special forces

[u/DaBingeGirl → u/Dajmibuzi_dzieki]

Black men. They often get beard exemptions for skin/ingrown hair conditions. Yes, there are white guys with beards, but this policy has been pretty wildly reported as disproportionately targeting Black men/POC.

[u/cesare980]

This dude loves a good rhyme.

[u/gohome2020youredrunk]

Guess JD Vance is out

[u/Prestigious-Key-1886]

Just come out of the closet my guy

[u/Stockholm-Syndrom]

I’m pretty sure beardos and weirdos win more wars than warriors.

[u/AdUpstairs7106]

No weirdos. Well there goes most of military intelligence.

[u/SilentMasterpiece]

Has he ever seen JD Vance or Ted Cruz?

[u/john_microslop]

Only alkies and natzies allowed in the Kegsbreath army

[u/SadhuSalvaje]

So legit question: did Kegseth have a weight problem as a child?

Pretty rich him calling someone a weirdo

[u/SillyGoatGruff]

He should just accept that what he really wants is to roll around in oil with some muscle twinks and go do that instead of fucking up the army

[u/ShakeyLegsMcGee]

Put Neidermeir on it, he’s a sneaky little shit.

[u/ProductIntegortion]

Meanwhile the FBI is embracing bestiality

[u/reject_fascism]

This grown man sounds like a child, SOS

[u/CrossX18]

Purge right before an election? Haven’t seen this at all in history.

[u/eatinpunkinpie]

Now we'll finally have a military capable of fighting a war in the 1950s!!!

[u/GentleBelligerent]

The US military, under Pete Hegseth, as drawn by Tom of Finland

[u/Wakandan15]

Look. Every empire ever, without fail, has crumbled to dust and become something the rest of the world has to memorize for a hot minute for a high school exam. We should learn to laugh about how sad and pathetic our dying happens to be. Like falling off a cliff trying to take a selfie. It’s not honorable. It’s not heroic. It just a giant waste.

[u/carterartist]

The only people I remember with “beards” in the army were special forces and minorities with skin conditions.

So he’s afraid of the special forces and a racist

[u/KingMobScene]

As a fattie beardo weirdo I am deeply offended by this as well as Pete's continued existence.

[u/asbestoswasframed]

Dude literally just described the President, Vice President, and Secretary of Health.

Maybe this is some secret plot for him to purge the entire line of succession and become de facto President?

[u/TriggerHippie77]

He's just mad that he can't grow a beard.

[u/Playful_Quality4679]

What is a beardo?

[u/deschain_19195]

He's turning the military into his personal herem

[u/Ghostworm78]

I can thing of one weirdo who I really want to see purged from the armed forces…

[u/CallRespiratory]

When I think of the list of problems plaguing the military, government, and country as a whole 'beardos' and 'fatties' are always near the top obviously.

[u/Plane-Champion-7574]

Beardos are primarily MAGA cult. You'd think they might want to keep them around.

[u/TruckGray]

So…he’s resigning?

[u/pokeysyd]

I’d be pretty happy if he could purge the military of Christian Nationalists.

[u/876050]

It appears to me that the SEC DOD is assuming we will be at war forever….no peacetime, war! Or he is prepping for the final war.

[u/Aggravating-Big3858]

Never head the term "Beardo" used before as a slander

Is that a real thing, or was Pete struggling to find something that rhymed with Werido?

[u/wastedgod]

Hesgeth has some pretty strong kinks

[u/That_Trapper_guy]

Was this his resignation? I'm confused

[u/DaFuqDat]

When der Führer says “Vee ist de master race” we Heil Heil right in der Führer’s face

[u/Tsuku]

“Anyway, here’s Elon!”

[u/kinterdonato]

Beardos? what is this Dairy of a wimpy kid?

[u/quietglue73]

IS THAT WHY MY GAS PRICES ARE SO HIGH???

[u/MammothPost4047]

Then Pete, you gotta go. Alcoholic abusive fundamentalist Christian weirdo

[u/TheGreatOldOwl]

Whole country is being run by weird ass farcry boss villains each with their own weird quirks and obsessions

[u/Shifty_Gelgoog]

Good, I don't want MAGA and any theists in the military, they're a bunch of weird pedos

[u/tinyE1138]

Man just described half the GOP, including his boss.

[u/Companero_basurero]

How about purging it of MAGA cult members whose first loyalty is to an orange idol rather than to the US Constitution? Well, maybe not - you'd have to purge yourself first.

[u/IncompletePoo]

That means him too right?

[u/michwolv089]

So he should remove himself then

[u/ImWatchingTelevision]

Hell of a way to talk about citizens that sign their life over to the pursuit of protecting this nation.

[u/Otherwise-Force5608]

But he'll keep all the pedos, religious fanatics, and traitors

[u/nonsensestuff]

He’s gonna purge himself?

[u/JonnySmithy → u/nonsensestuff]

Exactly. Hegseth is really weird.

[u/FormerUsenetUser]

Hegseth is definitely a weirdo, so . . .

[u/Loud_Traffic_1487]

Pedos and goat-fuckers welcome!

[u/Aliensinnoh]

I love that our Defense Secretary is a child

[u/R67H]

Saturday morning fox news guy said what?

[u/liebkartoffel]

Well, that's three for three for me, so I guess I don't get to play army with Pete. Shucks.

[u/MissKrys2020]

He’s purged so many people from the military at the same time they are losing a war, alienating allies and depleting missiles and weapons. How insane. It’s like they want to crash the whole country into a cliff

[u/KrivUK]

So why is he there then?

[u/Mytweezer]

Beardos includes Vance and Trump Jr. Lol

[u/Lord-Velveeta]

How about drunken idiot former C-Team Fox “news” hosts? Will he ban them?

[u/cdev12399]

Sounds like he’s describing ICE clowns

[u/NovemberInfinity]

Having served I’d say 99.9% of us are weirdos by some metric

[u/A_Norse_Dude]

How to alienate your voterbase...

[u/lizkbyer]

Says a war criminal

[u/VacantGazing]

I feel like the world would be such a better place if ol' Petey Kegstand just came out of the closet

[u/Jasoncatt]

Have you seen Elon Musk’s body shape?

[u/DRHawkI]

Already, wasn’t it just yesterday he said he’s bring on Elon musk?

[u/MechaD13579]

And now let’s welcome to stage the Ketamine Addict, Emerald Mine Apartheid Brat, and Murderer of Hundreds of Thousands due to his dismantling of USAID who is going to help lead you. The definitely not a weirdo, Elon “Botched Dick” Musk.

[u/JustDoc]

This was literally a cold opening from SNL's last season.

What a stupid fucking timeline.

[u/ViciousKnids]

Weirdos?

Dawg, have you met a Marine?

[u/ProudPainting6850]

What about rapists, racists, low achievers, white nationalists, alcoholics, and adulterers? 

[u/superdelicater]

Hegseth definitely sucks on dicks. I shouldn't care that he does. It shouldn't be a defining part of his character. It's just, he fucking makes it that way.

[u/randomcanyon]

Under that statement he should be escorted out as a "weirdo". Just like all the Felon Administration.